10 changes that would happen if McDonald’s was run like a Baptist church-
1. Customers would have to get prior, written approval from the Committee on Committees to super-size.
2. One side of the arches would be golden, the other teal to satisfy differing opinions on the Colors Committee.
3. The new McDonald’s opening two blocks away would take half the employees and customers and be called “Unity McDonald’s”.
4. “Billions and billions served” would be officially changed to “ga-gillions and ga-gillions served”.
5. Menus would be unchanged for decades.
6. New McDonald’s stores would change everything on the menu and then nothing would change for decades.
7. New McDonald’s would not put “McDonald’s” in their name so as not to offend the un-fast-food-eaters.
8. The children’s playground would be in the dank, dark basement.
9. Long discussions about different methods of serving Big Macs would take priority over actually serving Big Macs.
10. Coffee sales would go through the roof!