How to Have a Lousy Marriage in Seven Easy Steps

Married or planning to marry? Want to make that marriage as unhappy, bitter and painful as possible? Well, you’ve come to the right place. Here are seven easy steps to having a lousy marriage.

1. Make your marriage all about you. This is Lousy Marriage 101. Don’t consider your spouse. Make it all about you, you, you. Forget their interests, needs or love language. Better to not think of them at all. Keep the focus of the marriage all about what you want, what you like and what you need. Is that so hard? Continue reading

Keep Learning

Robert Fulghum famously titled a book, “All I Really Needed to Know I Learned in Kindergarten.” It is a great title, but a lousy philosophy of life. There is much to be learned after kindergarten- algebra, geology and how to cook a good steak, to name a few.

The best leaders are life long learners. They don’t stop learning after school ends. They don’t believe they possess they sum of all knowledge or that what they currently know is sufficient. They ask questions, seek information and try new things.

Christian leaders especially need to continue to learn. Our calling cries out for continuing education- formal and informal. We would do well to keep studying, thinking and searching. There is much for us yet to learn about God’s word, his plans and the ministry he calls us to.

Perhaps, like me, you finished kindergarten long ago. But here are five reasons ministry leaders need to continue to learn as long as God gives us life and breath. Continue reading

“Shut up!” he explained.

The title summarizes much of what passes for discourse and discussion today. We are more likely, it seems, to attack than converse. We tend to disagree so disagreeably. We appear to have lost the ability to have helpful conversations about areas where we may differ. This negatively affects us in our jobs, our families and our friendships.

Perhaps it is partially the result of media and social media. News shows have purveyors of opposing views talk over each other as though the best volume provides the best logic. Social media rewards demeaning attacks with attention and followers as though exclamation points make the point. Is there a better way?

James 1:19 provides some valuable insight for us. “Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger.” Here, God’s word gives us three ways to improve our Continue reading

Tell Your Story

Good thoughts from my sweet wife!

wateringcanblog

My story is not a dramatic one, but it starts in the shadow of pain.

I was born 10 months after the tragic death of a sister, only eight months old.

Pain has a way of shaping you, and my sweet mother was never the same after losing a child.  I know.  She’s told me.

Momma calls me her “sanity child” because having a new baby to care for helped her to take her focus off her pain and instead, concentrate on keeping this new baby– and a two-year-old little boy safe and healthy.

I can vividly remember when my first son was born.  Bringing him home from the hospital was exciting and scary.  This precious bundle was fully reliant on me to meet his needs.  Sleep was never again the same, always listening for breathing sounds and getting up to check on him often, the two to three hours…

View original post 1,230 more words

Get Back Up

I was a young, energetic high school freshman football player. All enthusiasm, no experience. We were punting and I was running downfield to cover the punt, foolishly looking up to see where the ball was. Wham! I was knocked flat by an opposing player rudely taking advantage of my vulnerable state.

Know what I did next? Well, first I rolled around on the ground trying to get my bearings and calling out for my mother. But, eventually, I did what every football player must do at times. I got back up.

Football players aren’t the only ones who get Continue reading

Discipleship isn’t a Program

Let’s face it. If discipleship was simply finding and following a program, the discipleship dilemma would have been solved long ago. Programs we have. Effective disciplemaking? Not so much.

I appreciate the role of programs in discipleship. They provide needed resources and helpful direction. They can point us down the right path and keep us from theological ditches. But discipleship takes more than a program. Authentic, life changing discipleship needs relationships.

Jesus spent time with people. In particular, he spent time with the 12 disciples. He taught them. He modeled proper behavior for them. He challenged them. Jesus even rebuked them where necessary. His discipleship course was the course of his life lived together with these men.

Perhaps we should see discipleship more like this. It is best done through relationships with other followers of our Lord. Stronger Christ followers helping other Christ followers live the life of Christ could become our model. We could begin to see discipleship as being done best through relationships rather than programs. Programs can be a tool, but relationships are the means.

Here are three reasons to see relationships as more important than programs in discipleship.

1. We need examples. Information Continue reading

Why Connect with an Imperfect Local Church?

Perhaps you have noticed that your local church isn’t perfect. If you haven’t, many people will be happy to point that out to you. The lost world, disgruntled former members and even much of contemporary Christian culture delights in pointing out the many flaws and warts of the church. And, let’s face it, the church has earned portions of her criticism.

Some local churches have accepted or condoned aberrant theology, ungodly behavior and unbiblical practices. I would never ask you to connect with churches that willingly disobey God and his word. But what about the church that is trying but failing? What about that local church that wants to follow God fully but never fully succeeds?

Why in the world should Christians join local churches that are messed up and lacking? Why give, serve and worship in places that are so obviously flawed? Here are some reasons for you to connect with imperfect local churches. Continue reading